


Brilliant

by AutisticWriter



Category: The Fast Show
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Fluff, Gay Pride, Homophobic Language, Homosexuality, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Kissing, M/M, One Shot, Past Violence, Queer Characters, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 11:43:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8371027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutisticWriter/pseuds/AutisticWriter
Summary: The Brilliant Kid has something very exiting he wants to tell the viewers.





	

_The Brilliant Kid addresses the camera as he walks along a seaside promenade. As he talks, his background changes, and the picture changes from colour to monochrome for no apparent reason._

**Brilliant Kid:** Ain’t sexual orientations brilliant? They’re like words that explain to other people who you fancy, which can be quite helpful, ‘cause it might take a lot of explaining otherwise. There are loads of different sexualities – like, almost ten! – but most people only know a few, and it’d take me _ages_ to say them all. So, _basically_ , there’s heterosexual – or straight, as most people call it – which is what most people are, and I think it’s a bit boring – a bit predictable, you know? And then there’s homosexual, which is what being gay means. Which means you like people of them same sex as you, so like a girl loving a girl, you know? And then there’s bisexual, which means you like both. How brilliant is that? It’s like the best of both worlds. Fantastic!

_The scene changes, and his costume has changed. He is now wearing a rainbow beanie hat, and a badge with pink, purple and blue stripes pinned to his coat._

**Brilliant Kid** : I’ve quite recently realised that I’m bisexual. Ain’t that brilliant? Well, no, actually, you probably think I’m weird, ‘cause most people think bi people are just gay people who’re scared to come out – including me mam. But that’s stupid, ‘cause I used to think I was straight. ‘Part from the odd celebrity crush, I’ve never really fancied blokes. Well, not until last month, anyway.

_He draws to a halt in front of some railings, which he leans his back against. The camera zooms out to reveal a man stood beside him. This man is wearing a rainbow scarf, and has a rainbow badge pinned to his dark blue waterproof jacket. He grins nervously at the camera._

**Brilliant Kid:** But I fancy a bloke now, and now I know I’m definitely bi. This is Darren. ( _Grinning_ ) He’s my boyfriend.

 **Darren:** ( _Mancunian accent_ ) Hi.

 **Brilliant Kid:** He’s gay, so he only likes blokes. And he’s really cool. He really likes eighties music and British comedy. And that’s brilliant, ‘cause I like them too. We’ve got so much in common. We kissed last night. We kiss a lot. I never thought I’d like to kiss a bloke, but now I’ve tried, I’ve decided it’s brilliant. It’s different that kissing a girl, obviously, but they’re both brilliant in their own way. Ain’t kissing brilliant?

_Darren is smiling fondly at him as he talks to the camera._

**Brilliant Kid** : Later, me and Darren are gonna go to Gay Pride down in London! It’s gonna be brilliant! It’s gonna be great to finally celebrate my sexuality, and it’ll be even better with Darren. Darren’s been before and he says it’s brilliant, don’t you, Darren?

 **Darren:** Yeah, it is. You meet loads of new people, and its great fun. The only thing is you have to keep your wits about you, ‘cause there are always horrible people on the lookout to ruin everything.

 **Brilliant Kid:** Yeah, I almost forgot ‘bout that. That’s really the only thing that’s not so brilliant about realising I’m bi. If you’re not straight, loads of people hate you, and they want to stop you having rights and even hurt you. Someone hurt Darren once. They broke his nose and called him a ‘poofter’. Well, if someone tried that with me around, they wouldn’t get too far, would they, Darren?

 **Darren** : ( _Shaking his head and smiling_ ) No, they wouldn’t.

_Darren reaches over and gives him a quick kiss on the lips. The Brilliant Kid grins and puts his arm around Darren’s shoulders._

**Brilliant Kid** : So, even though something might go wrong, hopefully Gay Pride should be BRILLIANT!


End file.
